Monday, June 25, 2012

The Truth is......

.....Painful
....Surprising
....Motivating?
I recently had an epiphany.  
And that is that I have been deluding myself.....
 for much longer than I realized.
Lately, when someone would say to me "You look great.  You're doing a great job" I would respond with, "Well, I haven't been so good the last week or so."  
And in my mind, it really was only the last week or so.  
I truly believed what I was saying.
The truth is.....I've been saying that for a lot longer than I thought.  


 Like since March.

I use several apps on my iPhone to track my food, weight loss, etc.  I use an app called iSkinny for tracking my weight loss week to week.  I've been using this app for over a year now.  That's a year's worth of weight loss data - that I really never looked at closely until recently.  As a teacher, I get that data speaks volumes about a student's progress.  Well, I finally really looked at the data - and it speaks volumes about me and my progress these last few months.



Here I thought I was doing so well, but the truth is.......
I've been slowly, steadily climbing back up.  
See all the red arrows?  
Those are bad.  And there are way too many of them!

So, the weaker part of me wants to just quit.  
Give up.  
Throw in the towel.  
It was so much easier before March, 
but for some reason it got harder.  
And summer is making it monumentally more difficult.  
I'm home all day, with easy access to snacks.
However, I am going to fight off the weakness, and salvage my progress.  Honestly, I'm still down more than 20 pounds, which is awesome.  I need to nip this in the bud.  I am home all day, with easy access to healthy food, and a treadmill.  It's summer and it's a perfect time to go for a walk.  I'm not going to let this setback let me continue with the tailspin I am in.


So, today is the day I stop lying to myself.
I know what I have to do.....I've done it for almost a year.
I just needed to get that out there.  

To motivate myself, if nothing else.

8 comments:

  1. As I'm reading this, I realize that I'm in the same boat. Thanks for posting! Let's team up & be accountable to each other & maybe it'll help - after all, being friends for almost 40 years has to help somehow! I'm totally serious! Call me if you are interested. xo. Robin (the original one LOL)

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  2. If you want to join the blog, let me know. I can email you an invitation to be an author. It's a great place to vent. :)

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  3. Your not alone in your journey to weight loss. In January of this year I took a look at myself and did not recognize the person in the mirror. After dealing with 2 family members with cancer and the helplessness I was feeling I decided that I had to start doing something about my health and the first order of business TO TAKE OFF SOME LBS. I was the heaviest I had ever been in my life, even heavier than when I was pregnant both times. I was off the antidepressant medication that I was on for 6 years (and yes dr., I still believe it was menapausal related, he thought I was too young. Been menapausal since 47 y.o.) I realized I dropped 20 lbs without trying. Now I needed a jump start, so I joined Jenny Craig. I've been at my halfway point for a few weeks now,not eating as much of the Jenny meals and I am down 49 pounds since January. I know what you mean about being home during summer vacation and the kids being home from school and too many "goodies" being around. IT IS HARD. After 23 weeks of dieting I gained my first 2 pounds,but then this week I lost 3 pounds. I realize that in my 50's I'm not going to loose the weight as fast as I did in my 20's and it has to be a lifestyle change and not just a diet. At the end of the month I will have to stop paying for the Jenny meals,the money spent has to go elsewhere and I need to learn to eat what my family does. It will be a challenge because I still need to loose another 40 pounds. My portion size will be my greatest challenge. I don't plan on depriving myself of some snacks now and then, so I need to remember that I can still feel satisfied with 1 oz bag of chips instead of a 10 oz bag of chips. Size does matter here. Be happy for the 20 pounds you have lost, and if you have a setback, don't punish yourself and give it all up, just continue on. Walking is a great idea! Do it first thing in the morning before there are other distractions. Put on the Beatles and enjoy, or plan on walking somewhere instead of taking the car within a one mile distance, or take the dog for a walk. Your inner skinny girl is within your reach and I believe you can do it, be patient and enjoy the journey! Your only up 3 pounds since March, could be water :) Keep us posted.

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    1. OMG CB!!!! You look amazing in your profile pic!!!! Thanks for stopping by my little blog! Let me know if you would like to join in as a author as well. :)

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  4. It feels good knowing that other people are facing the same struggles as I am. Misery loves company, right? I know who the first Anonymous is.....is the second Anonymous someone I know? You seem to know me pretty well. LOL Beatles on the iPod - sounds like me! :)

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    1. Here's a clue: I just changed my profile picture on facebook today and used to teach with you at HH.

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  5. You can do it UAB! I've been telling myself the same thing as if saying it enough would make it true. We just have to remember that saying and doing are two different things. Once we start "doing" things will start looking up... not the scale though, that will be looking down ;)

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    1. Okay Miss Sassy - I know I can do it - but you must slap me if I try to eat sweets when we see Bel Ami on Wednesday. Actually, my mouth will be hanging open and drool will be coming out when I see Rob's fine ass, so it shouldn't be a problem. See, every blog needs a little Rob! LOL

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